Out here on the ranch there are people and animals and machinery and water and buildings and growing things and plans thought out but maybe not discussed with one another…
When you combine all the moving parts sometimes things can go kinda weird, get tangled up so to speak.
Like last week I came home from something or other to Husband pushing dirt on the Bobcat, just like every other dry summer day. We have been working on landscaping and planning for a fence to keep the cows out of yard, so getting the dirt in the right places has been the longest and first step in the process.
Anyway, so I get home and I drop my bags, shuffle the mail pile on the counter and look out the window at the hill where the horses generally graze, and then down at the plum patch on the edge of what will be our fenced in yard one day.
Then I notice a piece of wire or string or something stretched across the edge of the yard, from the plum patch, across the open toward the dam, with no end that I could see…
With Pops and Husband involved in this place, a few scenarios run through my mind about the existence of this piece of wire or string or whatever.
1) Maybe Husband is staking out where the fence will go, which is good, because I think he’s right on in the placement.
2) Could Husband have strung a piece of electric fence or wire or something to temporarily keep the cows off his dirt moving masterpiece?
3) But it sorta looks like a piece of twine, and Pops was out here on the 4-wheeler the other day driving up the hill to check on things. I bet a peice got stuck to the back of his machine and he drug it a ways…that’s probably it…
4) Who the hell knows…these boys never tell me anything…I gotta call Pops, I’m too lazy to try to catch Husband on that Bobcat right now…
I dial…it rings…he answers.
“Hello.”
“Hi, it’s me. Yeah, did you like, string some twine across our yard, or like, maybe drag a piece on your 4-wheeler when you went by the other day…”
“No. No I didn’t. I noticed it too. It was there when I drove past…piece of twine, goes all the way up to the dam as far as I can tell…a cow musta drug it I think…”
“Well that’s a theory…really? Weird…I wonder how far it goes?”
“Yeah, I don’t know…”
“Well, ok, just checking…I guess I’ll go investigate…wrap it up…”
“Yeah, ok bye.”
I hung up.
Wonder where a cow picked up all that twine? Wonder where it got hooked? On her foot? On her ear? On a tooth or something?
How did she pull it all that way without a snag or a snap?
I headed down to the plum patch, which seemed to be the middle of her destination, twine strung up in the thorns and heading toward the dam in one direction, to oblivion in the other…
I grabbed it and followed it along the cow path that lead to the dam…
To the edge of the dam where she grabbed a drink…
and then literally into the dam where she must have hung out to cool off.
And then turned around
Then turned around to head to the shade of the trees up by the fence…
Where it looked like she might have taken and a nap and detached from it…
But that was only the beginning. because there I stood with a pretty substantial roll of twine around my arm looking for the end, which seemed to be trailing back toward my house again, up the hill and toward the barnyard, with no end in sight.
I backtracked, to find the source, coiling as I went…
It was going to be a long trip…
Back past the plum patch, up along the cow trail that turns into the road on the top of the hill. Past the old machinery and the broken down three-wheeler and lawn mower that we need to move for crying out loud. I have to get on that.
Then down toward the shop where the cow seemed to have gone back and forth, back and forth, zigzagging in front of the old tractor and little yellow boat. Then up to the old combine to scratch her back or something…
Then back up to the top of the hill, across the road, to the scoria pile we’re saving for a literal rainy day, then back down through the brush on the side hill toward the old combine again, tangling up in the thorns of the prairie rose patch somehow…
Then over toward the barn yard…wait, turn around, not yet…back in front of the shop, hooking on every stray weed and grass along the way, but never coming undone…no…where the hell did she pick this up?
Why did we leave a big-ass roll of twine just laying around for some creature without opposable thumbs to go dragging for miles and miles across the countryside?
Why can’t we get our shit together around here?
How long is this damn roll? How long is this going to take?
Do you know how long this is going to take!!!
And how does this even happen?
Where did it even…
Begin? …
Lol. Cows can get into some pretty big predicaments at times. Funny story!😀
THANKS for a damn good laugh i thought of all kinds of possibilities where that twine came from never considered the obvious.
You’re like the Nancy Drew of the Wild West. Good stuff!
Loved the suspense! That was great, imagining that cow just going about her business with twine attached…
This made me smile. I’m always amazed at the things livestock find a way to get into.
What a hoot. Love that you followed the string to see where it came from … that’s a lot of string !
Lol! Kept waiting to see how it was hooked to the cow.
This story totally made my whole day, Jessie! It is so funny and cute and I found myself reading faster and faster to see where the mysterious twine was going to end….
All your writings always put me in such a good mood. They make me want to leap up, throw boots and a coat on and run around in the hills with my dogs… keep it up!