Sunday Column: The kids and the quiet

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Yesterday Husband and I spent the last hours of daylight out here on the ranch putting up a fence to contain our yard and keep the cows out of our attempt to grow some grass for crying out loud.

We plotted and pointed, making plans for how big we wanted the space, how much we wanted to attempt to mow and contain.

It was just the two of us out there of course, but just like the other plans we’ve made for this colossal house project we embarked upon a few years ago, I couldn’t help but visualize the kids who might roll around in that grass someday, staining the knees of their jeans.

Husband, to make a point, stepped in the middle of the yard, grabbed an imaginary football and threw it across the imaginary grass.

“We want to make sure that there’s enough room here to throw a football,” he said.

I smiled and said “you’re right,” and then we were quiet for a beat or so, just long enough to let hope in before our hearts broke for the thirteen-millionth time in our lives.

We have a good life. We’re building one out here with passion and optimism for a nice little future, one that we always thought would include children.

And on a ranch, kept together solely because of and for the sake of the generations, my husband and I walk with the silent urgency of creating the next.

I will tell you there is no quiet like the quiet of hopes not yet realized.

Coming Home: Sharing home with the next generation
by Jessie Veeder
10-12-14
Forum Communications

I write a weekly column for North Dakota newspapers. Look for “Coming Home” Sundays in the Fargo Forum, and weekly in the Dickinson Press, Grand Forks Herald and Bismarck Tribune. Want my column in your newspaper? Let me know and I’ll help you make it happen!

6 thoughts on “Sunday Column: The kids and the quiet

  1. My family and I will be praying for yours. At times like these I like to recall the song by the great Garth Brooks, I’m sure you will know the one.
    We were blessed with four children but the story doesn’t end there we have welcomed some 90 plus children to our home through foster care and one of our prayers didn’t go unanswered, we adopted one of them four years ago! She’s 10 now and she knows I’m an old fart but she loves me anyway, thank God for small and large favors!
    I don’t write to strangers but I listened to and watched you perform at a St Benedict’s Candlelight dinner a few years back, I’ve been a fan and have followed your blog ever since. I am pulling for you and that good man of yours all the way! God has blessed us all and I know he’s got lots more coming your way! Keep up the good work and keep the Faith, He will never leave you!

  2. Jesse, I’m a Writer, you’re a Writer. Every song you create, is just that – a Creation. Just as there can be poetry in Life, there can be Life in Poetry. While you apprehensively await your desired Goal, perhaps reassure yourself with some smaller accomplishments along the way – you just wrote another song with this blog, it just needs arranging. Take the tendrils of “Ranch Generations”, “walk with silent urgency”, “creating the Next”, “there is no quiet, like the quiet, of Hopes not yet realized”, “pause to let Hope in to our Hearts”. You”ve got a timeless, universally relevant Winner waiting for you there. You go Girl…on both fronts. 🙂 Will

  3. Jess having lived through trying to expand our family of three to more I know the heart ache of which you speak. We are not in charge of how this goes and that is difficult to accept.
    Sometimes when we surrender our perceived control our prayers are answered by alternative means. I believe that you and your husband will be blessed with that grace in your future. And your heart ache will be but a memory of the life your future family will enjoy:-)
    Carry on Prairie Girl!!

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